MDD

Release Date
2020
Duration
2:51
Lyrics
all you see is recycled pain, 
passed down through my parents DNA 
unprepared, running scared, now before I left home,
the lessons I learned, were directed from her,
how the liquor lessons the burn, when the first incident occurred,
I saw my step father on a stretcher, alcohol was there to catch her, 
others drink it with chase, well she drinks its straight just to chase away the demons,
now she's leaving, separated but the memories never faded  
the system took my bothers and sisters, 
wish our mother was with us, from the struggle I witnessed, 
all these questions emerged, getting kicked to the curb,
so I murder my past like Micheal, to further detach myself from the cycle,
leave it behind, nurture my mind, and polish my words like a rifle, 
but it was never that easy always, feeling love, having people leave me, 
seeing blood I'm not talkin bout a gangsta I'm talkin bout how I use to be a danger to myself 
 
MDD if you dunno what that means
do your research x2
all this pain
can't be rehearsed x2
 
if I could reverse this Hurst into a carriage
just to see my brother grow and never had to perish, 
after that my family died, girlfriend left,ashes of my past lay buried in my skin,
I had to carry on, stay strong, tatted over, Hieroglyphs carved in my arms, 
this is more then self harm, scars that you have to decipher,
behind these bars like a lifer, 
 
pressed to limit like a semi automatic,
depressed is given, for many on the planet, 
expressed how I'm living, now I'm ready to die,
if depression was a drug we suppress till were numb
hold it steady as I try, desperation as I cry,
they say we ain't damaged its all in our heads,
they won't see the blood fallen in the end, 
the finger, the trigger, they figure we're ignorant,
tying the noose just to strangle the truth,
how could I make such an escape 
just to suffocate whats inside. 
whats inside.
 
its MDD if you dunno what that means
do your research x2
all this pain
can't be rehearsed x2
 
another part of me, departed, pardon me,
could you see this pain wholeheartedly
 
tell me why its hard to be cold hearted
now I'm guarded cause it started from my adolescence,
born to a mother with depression, swarmed by the struggles of aggression,
torn by the troubles of rejection, 
let me kill the lord for these imperfection,
like a stillborn, still warm, dying on conception,
 
let me interject 
 
ya it kills me more just to see them mourn and I'm sorry, for, 
 
I've become possessed, by the thorns of deception,
a multi armed form, at war with the lore cause they say I need a Saviour
Ya I wont con angels so hanging onto halos won't last long,
with the devil in my view, time to level out the playing field
 
MDD if you dunno what that means
do your research x2
all this pain
can't be rehearsed x2